What I Learned from the Twilight Series

With the current twilight hype sweeping across the globe, one of our Ranters, sQ, was kind enough to enlighten us with what the Twilight series by Stephanie Meyer taught her. Here's what she had to say =p


- You can't hurt a werewolf without breaking your hand.
- People get islands as presents.
- Really pale people are secretly vampires.
- There is a difference between shape-shifters and werewolves.
- Hollywood never gets anything "mythical" right.
- It's healthy to ditch class every once in a while.
- If a fight happens to break out at your wedding between your vampire husband and your werewolf best friend, no one will even notice, so it's okay.
- When your sister in law wants your baby more than she should and is planning to keep it once you're dead, it's okay.
- If your boyfriend can't hear your thoughts, it means you're a shield.
- If your skin looks sparkly while in the sunlight you are automatically a vampire.
- If you see someone with really pale skin & totally black eyes...RUN!
- When in doubt as to what to name your child, mash up the names of your parents & in-laws together.
- DO NOT forget to pack your silky Victoria's Secret pajamas.
- Keep you window open, that hot guy you like might climb in and watch you sleep.
- When camping in a blizzard, bring a space heater or a werewolf.
- Don't be surprised when vampires pay for everything and anything like college tuition, car payments, house payment, etc.
- When you're being stalked and about to be kidnapped by random frat boys, don't worry, the hot guy you like is gonna save you.
- If stuck in a love triangle, have a child. That solves everything.
- A paper cut can end life as you know it.
- You can find the answer to anything on Google.
- When in danger of being killed, get a whole new identity, some fake documents and flee to Brazil.
- Adrenaline rushes are common.
- Blondes get mad when you put food in their hair.
- That beautiful boy in school is not being rude when he ignores you. He's being very polite and trying to resist your blood.
- If a large Native-American boy keeps insisting on baby-sitting your 2-year-old daughter, or attending her princess-themed birthday party... watch out.
- Vampires don't actually sleep in coffins or turn into bats.
- Your vampire boyfriend will love you even if you cheat on him with your werewolf best friend.
- Vampires dont get speeding tickets.
- Morphine does not dull the pain caused by vampire venom.
- Never go to the overpriced mechanic for car troubles...just seek out the nearest werewolf.
- It is always good to have a before and an after car.
- Having friends around the world will benefit you someday.
- Biology could be the perfect place to meet the love of your life.
- Thunderstorms really mean vampires are playing baseball.
- Fluorescence can make your eyes change colors.
- The correct answer to the question “HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN 17?” is always “A WHILE”.
- All werewolves, although living in a very cloudy city, have a dark tan, and long hair.
- It is polite to call your girlfriend a spidermonkey.
- It's perfectly ok to disappear for a few days and then come back and try to act normal.
- Its normal to booty dance on a bush outside a diner when the chief of police is inside.
- As long as your going to hell you might as well date publicly and wear sunglasses on a cloudy day.
- When your dad is cleaning his gun, you should tell him about the date you have with a vampire.
- The easiest way to piss of a mind reading vampire is by imagining his girlfriend naked.
- The perfect man is one who writes you a lullaby and then plays it on a grand piano.

p.s. all in good fun, don't kill me lol =)

Screwdriver Volume III

Our much delayed issue, that is unfortunately too short. Still we try to be thankful for what we get.


M Jay: Everyone here?
Haywire: Yup
SB: I am :)
sQ-: I may be lost :P
Retro Junky: Hello
M Jay: Btw we are guy free today :D
Haywire: Cool! girl power [Insert Power Puff Girl OST]
sQ-: Blessing is it? haha
M Jay: You have the open floor people.. start away
SB: With what? No topic?
M Jay: Hey if you must now my notebook is about to die out on me in exactly 10 minutes
sQ-: Yes a topic would be nice
M Jay: It was RJ's special request to go topic-less
sQ-: ahh:P
SB: Arey wah really? So what do you want to talk about RJ?
Retro Junky: Nothing na! we r topic-less rofl
M Jay: We should definitely discuss clothes since like dude that is so girly you know and like omg I’m like totally girly!
Retro Junky: Exactly!
sQ-: Does this mean randomness pouring out?
sQ-: Clothes remind me I bought red stilettos too
Retro Junky: Yeah so I bought this pink lawn fabric from Shink Fabrics Blomerdy
Retro Junky: aab us pay gota kinaari lagaanee hai bas
M Jay: You're killing me
M Jay: PINK = HOT and well baby pink = EXTRA HOT : pink = chili sauce
Retro Junky: Have to buy shoes too! From Ksaan!
SB: very nice
Retro Junky: I bought hot pink it’s all pink, plain. Now I can’t decide on the lace! Should I go for golden or silver? cham cham waali?
SB: definitely cham cham
M Jay: excuse me while I wait for my laptop to heave breaths
Haywire: cham cham yess
sQ-: cham cham is good
Retro Junky: haan cham cham but golden or silver?
SB: golden
Haywire: silver defto
Retro Junky: ohhhh confuse na karo aik color btaoo
Retro Junky: How abt dull golden?
M Jay: are you s******* me
Retro Junky: a belt on hot pink
SB: how about bright and cham cham wala
M Jay: you are haina you are slowly twisting the knife in my gash
sQ-: silver
Retro Junky: hmmmmm *-)
sQ-: gold won’t go would it
Haywire: y not try shocking pink... looks really good on light pink
Retro Junky: silver would make the whole dress more loud, I mean it’s already hot pink na so shud add dull gold belt in it
Retro Junky: The dress is hot pink Haywire
M Jay: us and our fashion advices (read vices)
SB: lol we are actually discussing RJ's clothes!!!
sQ-: lol
Retro Junky: haaaaaahahaha well I bought the fabric na :P u didn’t :P Go and buy the fabric first then we'll discuss yours :P
M Jay: I thought you bought it to communicate with mars we can finally get our alien link
Retro Junky: LOL!
M Jay: FCUK = MARS CONNECTION
M Jay: eff FC
M Jay: UK that is
sQ-: oh wow dis is random
SB: n my bro is insisting that I stop chatting so he can see gossip girl!
Retro Junky: LOL!
M Jay: OMG you did not just say that
Retro Junky: usko kaho let the girl gossip!
SB: I did
M Jay: I repeat you did not! *Takes a deep breath*
Retro Junky: Her brother is in touch with his feminine side thanks to B! B ney apnay saath baith keh har series apnay bhai ko dikhaya karo!
M Jay: So your drunken logic behind this is?
SB: He doesn’t watch it because of that lol he thinks Blair is hot
Retro Junky: gr8 :P
M Jay: Drunken logic = hot Blair?
M Jay: I’m about to die out now see you on the other side
Retro Junky: I got only 9 min to save the world?
M Jay: Yes please because 4 minutes is just too less..

DRSM: Screwdriver Volume II

Our very own theatrical vignettes.
Always the one to grab at any available opportunity, my fellow ranters and I assess our lives hypothically for what they are.. Exhibits for the ones surrounding us.


[When talking to "reliable sources" its always safe to relay as much information as possible]
M Jay: My first assignment was a murder case investigation: a drug abusing teenage boy accused of killing his mother.



[Random Fact #1]
M Jay: Do you know the police force has the lowest IQ
M Jay: Like below 74 :S
Retro Junky: Woahh and why doesn't that surprise me!



Retro Junky: IQ test: Which tree isn’t made of wood ?
DO NOT DISTURB: I know banana tree
Retro Junky: yay jawab durust huaa , laado sabun kee taraf sey gift package aap ka hua! taaalian!



Retro Junky: http://www.time.com/time/specials/2007/article/0,28804,1734666_1734664_1734656,00.html
Retro Junky: Johar Joshanda rules!!!
M Jay: lol aww.. and to think I run away from it all the time haha



[And then some...]
Retro Junky: I'm having a depression attack!!
M Jay: Pot meet kettle. You're talking to a depressed-holic yourself.



[Fact #567382. Studying Psychology for even a little amount of time can do that to you]
M Jay: Am I allowed to be your shrink for a while?
Retro Junky: Sure
M Jay: What would mademoiselle like to talk about?
Retro Junky: There is nothing to talk about, its all wait and see situation for me.
M Jay: But you are frustrated that you have no control over your life.
M Jay: "Sorry seems to be the hardest word, Waiting seems to be the hardest verb"
Retro Junky: Thats so true. I just want to get independent as soon as possible.
M Jay: Yeah well its either that or we get a brain makeover.



[Exhibit # 222. When daughters have had had enough]
sQ-: I told mum yesterday that nurses and doctors and lawyers have the highest rate for divorce in the west becuz of the 12 hr shifts we have to work.
sQ-: I think I scared her haha. But its true!
sQ-: And the three can't marry within themselves because then its even worse.
sQ-: And they can’t marry business people cuz they earn more than them and for a woman thats trouble since a husband won't take the wife earning more than him:P
sQ-: And I also told her that career for the three is beyond demanding and family takes a back seat.
sQ-: I know... I'm terrible.
sQ-: But its true. So indirectly I told her not to imagine me with a doctor or a lawyer or a business man.
sQ-: Technically no ones left :P... But we shall see:P
sQ-: Buys me time ugh!
M Jay: God! you're just too evil ;p



[Girls and their accessories]
sQ- I bought an Ipod so now I'm waiting till august to buy a camera. Ughh I think Im probably going to end up gettin Cybershot.
M Jay: I'm willing to trade all my dvds for a decent camera.
sQ-: I will grab you one if u want when I come.
M Jay: ooooo.. my very own santa ;)
M Jay: You can bring me a nice fluffy kitten as a present and then I'll be coughing mouthfulls of cat hair.
M Jay: So don't feel guilty on my account.. You know when I'm in the hospital taking my last breath.
M Jay: I so won't blame you.
sQ-: You are such a tart:D



[Exhibit #82727: Some of us are actually excited about the prospect of having less air to breathe in]
M Jay: You do not have finals!
L Coeus: Have a paper today :D .. Its called finance for engineers.
M Jay: God the name in itself is amazing :P
L Coeus: This is one of the easiest papes..
L Coeus: Don't make me tell you the demonised names!
M Jay: Thanks but I think I'll pass..




AT: So M
AT: I feel weird/hyper.
AT: Its strange.. Its like I get drunk
AT: I say things which I feel bad about saying later on... So ignore 80% of wht I say when I type 1.
AT: 1 means hyperness, its the true meaning of 1. No one told anyone that.
M Jay: Ignorance is bliss... now I know.




[Metal.. bands and the like]
AT: ;P is male and ;J is female
M Jay: aiwee!
AT: The long body of J shows the length of hair!
M Jay: Don't turn all sexist on me! Only i have the right to do that
AT: That was my first reaction. Seriously!
M Jay: Guys have long hair too. ;p
AT: Those are GAY guys.
AT: Gay nordic metal heads who have fair skins.
M Jay: So whatever. They are guys still.
AT: Pale skin to be exact. Tall guys.
M Jay: haha ewww.
AT: Seriously dude these nordic dudes.. They're like ghosts.
M Jay: I liked my breakfast today thank you very much.
AT: Long hair, pale skin, tall height. They represent the underground metal bands.
AT: Haunting..
M Jay: We should open a salon for them. I'll setup a shrink network in the backyard. Totally workable!
AT: Haha. They call themselves gods. Amazing pics they have.
M Jay: Yeah gods of dogs maybe.

DRSM: Screwdriver Volume I

We are all creatures of habit, here our habit is more of a re-telling of things we would never imagine disclosing and yet we tell and forget. How apt. My fellow ranters think I don't have any dirt on them and well me. Ha Ha!

So its just another day and when two of us who are obviously high on too much talking to themselves decide to show ourselves that yes we have people to talk to and yes people get us, this is what it comes down to..

AT: signed: M JAY!
M Jay: haha my other quarter half. I think everyone has more than 2 people at least inside of them... no one is wholly one. I just decided to give mine a name and recognize it
AT: Agreed. More like a mood.
M Jay: nahi it is like more than two people inside And I do not have multiple personality disorder!
AT: I went through this phase in which I told people how their friends were telling stuff about them and then ran away.. it was fun.
AT: yea you've got two people inside of you but you don’t have MPD
M Jay: exactlee... what’s so wrong about it? :D


AT: I’m trying to convince my psychology teacher he's got two personalities..


M Jay: crazy fact: I picked up DHL for my computer project because of the color red.
AT: Its yellow and red! TCS is red.
M Jay: I know its yellow and red.
AT: but u chose to ignore yellow haha
M Jay: but red was more prominent for me :P
AT: DHL is hot. I want to marry a DHL representative from Russia.
M Jay: DHL representative: OK
M Jay: Russia: ahhhhhhhhhh OK
M Jay: got it :P
AT: Hahaha nah j/k man I love all girls equally No discrimination!!! One love for all!


__________________________________________________________



And then another fine day...


AT: I forgot what I said that made you totally get something but I’m glad u totally got it
M Jay: brava!
AT: alaa!
AT: Do we get to wage wars on other nations? A little bit of conspiracy and tension perhaps? no no?
M Jay: haha read the guideline. I only saw it today
AT: i am
AT: Do we make our own countries? Or do we choose the names from the present world? (ignoring the guidelines)
M Jay: We make our own country smarty pants.
M Jay: I can't believe i just said that
AT: But what about the geography? I mean, how far will my country be from yours or someone else's? But that is for me to play and find out
AT: Why? because u doubt my smartness?
M Jay: we are all in the Pacific and then we rule it.. My country is inhabited by unicorns.
M Jay: http://www.chucknorrisfacts.com/
AT: Who is Chuck Norris anyway? Some TV show gone global before i was born?
M Jay: What?! Let me Google that! He’s an actor. martial arts... Blah blah..
AT: And guns too apparently
M Jay: oh and a black belt too
AT: Just what the world needs!
M Jay: haina?
AT: Atlantis is reserved!!
M Jay: of course it is.
M Jay: The leading causes of death in the United States are: 1. Heart Disease 2. Chuck Norris 3. Cancer.
AT: so is Babylon [Not the leading cause of death its not]
M Jay: every sanely insane name is… i had to name my country Brack Forest with an american accent.
AT: Nice! hahaha
AT: "Checking "Chuck Norris"... RESERVED. That name was used by a former nation. ".. taubah
M Jay: hahaha shoot.. our options are limited
AT: VERY limited. Middle Earth's taken too.
M Jay: I knowww :( i bet hobbiton is too. Shireville? i guess smallville is gone as well.
M Jay: Roswell? Area 54!
AT: lol I’m searching Google for a cool name
M Jay: earth to mars
AT: they're all gone
M Jay: that’s total bhaooness
AT: this isn't fair
AT: I got this name "uniqued" Lazarus Isle. Couldn’t get ANYTHING else
M Jay: Haha at least you did get something
AT: imagine a mom saying that to a kid coming from a bday party where all the other kids got cooler presents after winning games
M Jay: Imagining...
M Jay: my mum never said that
AT: Done with nations, I chose the Afghani flag... which one did u chose? And the motto?
M Jay: Wales. We wander therefore we are..
AT: I see.. I went berserk because of the limitations put upon my mind and said "unity, faith and discipline".. currency: coin.



Interested in waging imaginary wars on other *******? Or just want to see the land of the unicorns? Go to: http://www.nationstates.net/

Trial and Run: YES! Brack Forest does exist..

The Free Land of Brack Forest is a very large, socially progressive nation, renowned for its burgeoning unicorn population. Its intelligent population of 62 million are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whoever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.
The medium-sized, corrupt, liberal government is effectively ruled by the Department of Religion & Spirituality, with areas such as Social Welfare and Law & Order receiving almost no funds by comparison. The average income tax rate is 17%, but much higher for the wealthy. A substantial private sector is led by the Cheese Exports industry, followed by Information Technology and Soda Sales.

DRSM Session II.V

Topic: Human Genome Project

Moderator: M Jay


Retro Junky: I searched Vermeer's paintings, The Concert got stolen in 1992 and still not found and I actually felt sad :
M Jay: Yeah I did that too when I read the book, its one amazing book haina?
M Jay: GWAPE. I actually like that. Haha! Anyway..... so I read it like a year back.. Or maybe 6 months... dunno.. seems the same.
Retro Junky: I loved it after I was done reading it. lol no, actually it got interesting when I was mid way through.
M Jay: Me too.. And well Vermeer, any thoughts? The man himself is this shroud of mystery.. I tried researching on him. But only got vague tidbits.
Retro Junky: Well he was lazy I must say, like come on yeah you were creating master pieces but u could have gone a little faster. Family kee parwah nahi aur lagga hai paint maarnay.
Retro Junky: Yeah he was a mystery but the story wasn’t true was it?
M Jay: No no.
M Jay: Vermeer was Dutch rite?
Retro Junky: Yupp.
M Jay: And he had a patron like most artists that time.
Retro Junky: He did a painting of that town he lived in.
M Jay: The work itself is flawless.. i loved the painting, and the pearl resembled a tear no?
Retro Junky: Yeah it did.
M Jay: Interesting fact: This painting is signed "IVMeer" and not dated.
Retro Junky: Yeah why is that?
M Jay: Unclear... we don't even know if it was commissioned by anyone. The most recent restoration of the painting was in 1994 btw.
Retro Junky: Restoration?
M Jay: Yeah they carry out painting's restorations after certain time gaps.
Retro Junky: Oh like with the chemicals n stuff? You'd know better Jay :P since u have been painting sum master pieces yourself lately :P upload em on the blog
M Jay: Haha HAVE NOT!
M Jay: Yeah they clean the paintings maintain it and stuff.
Retro Junky: I just don’t know much about paints, but I saw this documentary on BBC about this painting of sunflowers forgot the artist oops! u know of it?
M Jay: It’s a tricky world. Nope didn't see it.
M Jay: What was your favourite part?
Retro Junky: Hmm fav part..
M Jay: Btw RJ I had some issues with Griet at first.
Retro Junky: What sort of issues?
M Jay: I thought she was kind of flirty :S
Retro Junky: With Vermeer? YES!
M Jay: Thats just what I thought.. or maybe its the fact that johanson plays her in the movie and I don't like her at all.
M Jay: And Pieter.. the butcher's son... how apt :P



SB has been added to the conversation



Retro Junky: In fact I think she was infatuated with him! even before she met him!
Retro Junky: I haven’t seen the movie yet.
M Jay: Neither have I lol... it’s just the book that gave me that feeling
M Jay: http://www.lloyds.com/dj/DowJonesArticle.aspx?id=392824
Retro Junky: : They found the whole human genome!!!
M Jay: HEROES!
M Jay: http://www.ornl.gov/sci/techresources/Human_Genome/home.shtml
M Jay: Btw B the whole genome thing makes me think of Heroes lol and seriously it is being worked on by some organization.
M Jay: But overall I loved the description of paintings.
Retro Junky: Yeah me too, I cud actually imagine them.
M Jay: The whole part where they prepare and mix colours exactly, one of the reasons why I love this book, it’s so vivid.
Retro Junky: Yupp, oh but I cudnt imagine the tiles her father had made.
M Jay: The descriptions are perfect, the setting is believable.
SB: Ahem people when u r through discussing the book tell me.
M Jay: Actually it’s not too difficult..
M Jay: I mentioned the genome project just moments ago :P
Retro Junky: Loll B they figured out the whole genome and we dint even know! 4 males and one female.
Retro Junky: Jay when did they discover the males? [Mod: 10,000 B.C. would be my guess]
SB: What's wrong with you? Miss B****** did tell us that!
M Jay: Have no idea really.. Just saw this about the female genome being mapped.
Retro Junky: She did? I thought she said they are 'working' on it I didn’t know they had found it already.
SB: Nope she said it had been going on for a long time it must have been done by now no actually she said it was done.
SB: Yeahhh but they did it in an indirect way I dun remember much.
M Jay: Just checked.. it was a 13 yr project.
SB: The whole project isn’t very detailed.
Retro Junky: Ohhh and when was it completed?
M Jay: 2003. Began formally in 1990.
M Jay: http://www.ornl.gov/sci/techresources/Human_Genome/project/about.shtml
SB: Lol I aint that crazy about knowing this.
M Jay: All I know is that a genome is an organism’s complete set of DNA and that’s it lol.
Retro Junky: I would like to get my sequence out!! lol
M Jay: And what would you do?
Retro Junky: Frame it and hang it in the drawing room! And then ppl who would come for my rishta will be able to see how amazing my DNA sequence is and I carry no genetic diseases! :D
M Jay: Haha IF they can figure it out. Or they may just label you a freak which in my case works just fine.
M Jay: Imagine anything close to what they meant in Heroes.. Hey do you think they twisted that part or is it actually possible?
SB: What is possible?
Retro Junky: Heroes stuff isn’t possible.
SB: Why not? mutation in genes aint impossible it happens all the time.
Retro Junky: Yea but a mutation cannot make you radioactive!! or make you fly!!
M Jay: Hey! not everyone on Heroes is radioactive. You do know that half the 'powers' are actually believable. And seriously, who the hell makes reality anyway? I mean if a meteor strikes tomorrow, will we keep on repeating to ourselves.. it isn't possible because blah blah said so?
SB: Right now mutations can cause cancers etc.
Retro Junky: Come on SB be able to read minds?? come back from the dead??? However one thing that Claire does is possible!!!
SB: Maybe someday human beings can adapt to the change, survive and well come out as reformed and a little advanced species.
SB: What do we know?!
Retro Junky: You can regrow your body parts!! no kidding! saw it on BBC!!!
SB: Ohh that.. I dunno about that but I do think that people are becoming more intelligent.
Retro Junky: I actually saw it happening! it was crazy! And US military is showing interest in this new discovery! ********
SB: Maybe that’s a mutation too!!!
M Jay: It’s possible... "anything is possible if you just believe" - A Cinderella Story
Retro Junky: LOL!
Retro Junky: No I dun think so.
M Jay: Why is that?
SB: Well if God intends something like this it will happen otherwise it won't.
Retro Junky: No it wont.
M Jay: If according to Darwin we come from the house of monkeys/apes whatever they should be actually proud we're button pressing suits these days. So impressive don't you think?
Retro Junky: We can create a device that would be able to catch the electrical impulses in our mind but we as human beings cant do it, unless we fix that device in our heads!
SB: What Darwin believes is incorrect we didn’t originate from apes we came as human beings on Earth.
M Jay: That’s what WE know, I’m talking about them.
M Jay: Pronoun deficiency i certainly do not have
M Jay: See it this way... THEY think that way, hence THEY will try every trick in the book to try to make it happen
M Jay: WE don't.
SB: Lol They aren’t going to make i happen they cant make it happe this isnt something that human beings can do.
M Jay: That’s where you're wrong B. Remember the nation which could tell angels from humans? God gave humans so much strength than we can possibly imagine and those who use it achieve things which we think are impossible however it doesn't mean what we are doing is correct.
Retro Junky: That nation is gone.
SB: I know but God did that not human beings themselves so point kia tha God ney dein powers God ney lein leen man kaa kya kamal hai?
M Jay: So if I cough.. God made me?
M Jay: God does give us powers yes BUT we use it the way we see fit.
SB: Not always Taqdeer.
M Jay: Come on! two different people do two different things. sure taqdeer yes but we play to our strengths as well don't we? and I believe man himself is a miracle of God and that’s enough to win any argument.. we may lose our humanity in the process of trying to 'save' humanity though, in fact i think we already have.
SB: Very random things. What’s the point? I'm confused.
M Jay: Why does there have to be a point?
Retro Junky: Yeah we have. So there should be a limit rite? Like stem cell research and cloning? Yes we can do it but does God want us to do it? Are we sure we r not playing God here? going against nature etc.
SB: We can never play God we dun have a 00000000000000000000000.1% of the idea of what’s going on in the universe.
M Jay: We are TRYING B that’s the thing. We are taking a small thing and imagining worlds within worlds out of it.
SB: If u look at it like that it's wrong.
Retro Junky: Nahi SB it’s not wrong to discover.

SB: No I didn’t say that I am saying keh saying that we are acting like God while we do it is wrong.
Retro Junky: But its wrong when it comes to messing with things God has created.
M Jay: Yes it is and I’m sorry but people caring about dolphin's existence when hundreds of innocents die every day in places like Palestine cracks me up.
SB: M kya kha keh rahi ho? You are switching from one topic to another so swiftly.
Retro Junky: lol yeahh I agree with that. Like looking for places for 'homeless' dogs to live in?? Why can't those ppl be foster parents to a homeless child!
M Jay: My brain works that way B lol. And I’m pretty sure we'd be labeled animal haters soon even though I’ve had more pets in my life than anyone can possibly imagine.
Retro Junky: Same here. I mean i loveeeeee Oscar lekin I would kill him to save a human life.
M Jay: Why didn't you name him Grammy waisey? just curious.
Retro Junky: Haha he is a MALE dog! Grammy is so girlish. You find a Grammy for him ;) It’s about time he got married.
M Jay: Aii aii captain! so just one last thing... are we royally screwed here? I was reading this column by some guy who stated that Punjabi would possibly cease to exist in the next 50 years and I just couldn’t help thinking.. i don't even know if we will survive ourselves, Punjabi tou dur ki baat hai.
SB: Hmmm it will. Nobody speaks it :( Which is kind of sad because it's funny and likeable

UEFA Final '08

Since NO ONE ELSE bothered to watch the match among us
Here I am. *tongue*

M Jay writes what she feels like...

It’s the first-ever UEFA Champions League final between EPL’s two most deadly teams: Manchester United and Chelsea. I had been waiting for the ‘clash of the titans’ for over two weeks and wow what a match it was. Blood, cussing, wrong tackles, almost-slaps, spitting; what’s not to like? Umm yeah except for the horrendous kits sported by goal keepers of both teams that is. And that awful Scholes injury as well. He had me almost crying there.
I’d like to mention the following people... Well just because they were a greater source of amusement/ anger than others..

Our very own drama queen: Ronaldo. Nah, seriously last night was like watching a sulky kid on the playfield who couldn’t have his way. Ronaldo is always a source of amusement no matter what. He’ll tackle beautifully one minute, act worthy of an Oscar the other (World Cup anyone?). But of course that does not steal the ingenuity of his header in the 26th minute. Just go with the flow. Classic

I think I’m finally coming around to accepting Ferdinand as the captain. It wasn’t easy but it’s done and well nothing that I can do about it. His largeness had quite much to say last night, but he was pretty much in the game most of the time unlike Terry, who only made any impression towards the last moments. Pressure much?
Its 3:30 into the ET and rain starts pouring in the gorgeous Luzhniki Stadium. Lampard misses a shot and I’m forced to wonder, is it not a sign? Perhaps just a tiny bit of raindrop in the eye...

But aha the highlight of the night comes not from the winning team but the runners up, even though Man U had quite a lot to say in it. THE FIGHT. So okay it wasn’t like a whole fist fight, just maybe a mild slap on the face, finger pointing and the usual cursing. Drogba gets a Red! Ahh the irony haha! Professional suicide dude. Tevez is left off with a Yellow and so is Ballack. But the funniest thing was Abramovich’s expression: priceless. He must have been counting all the benefits of sitting on home ground but really?

I have to say, no matter how talented Drogba is I just can’t come around to ever liking him. And with the whole high school lingo... (Shut Up, Frak Off, Whatever?? =S) not really a fan winner there. But then apart from Lampard and Ballack he was the only guy making an effort to actually get into the attack mode. However, that missed shot was just that missed.. by what 1200 miles? Seriously, you practise?

And Joe Cole, I don’t know who told you you’re cute but your antics on the field yesterday were just not at all funny. I think the barber might have shaved off a part of your brain along with your hair the last time you paid him a visit.

Lampard had earlier managed to tie the game in the 45th minute, hence leading to ET twice. Of course no one bothered with scoring any goal, however they were busy otherwise: faking injuries, water breaks and the almost bum-fights. By the end of it all I was beginning to feel sorry for the stewards, poor kids had to drag in a stretcher every time a player tripped or fell. What the hell, are you two years old?

And then the penalty shots. The joy and the fear. Best way to have a heart failure. I hated the WC match between England and Portugal for the same reason. Have some mercy guys. It’s brutal.

Man U got on Tevez, Carrick, Ronaldo, Hargreaves, Nani, Anderson and Giggs for the penalty shots. Chelsea had Ballack, no idea, Lampard, Cole, Terry, Kalolou, and Anelka. You’d think watching penalties going down wasn’t enough drama; Ronaldo had to go and miss his. Strangely predictable actually. That No. 7 jersey carries with it a subtle curse as well. So now that Man U was at disadvantage Chelsea fans couldn’t be happy enough. However, on comes Terry at number five. The rain’s pouring down, the field is soaking wet and if you follow enough soccer, you would know it’s a match made in heaven for the opposing team. Viola, Terry misses his turn as he slips and is that joy I see on our beloved boy’s faces. Yes siree.

Now that the penalties are tied again with Anderson and Kalolou successfully taking their shots, it all comes down to the Butterfly Man, Anelka. Van Der Sar, God I feel like hugging him crazy, that man used reverse psychology out there on the field, believe me you. And how it worked! Anelka takes his turn, misses and feefaaaaaa... (Sorry it’s just that I love that UEFA soundtrack)

So Man U wins against Chelsea on penalty shots 6-5 and I’m all happy. Thank God it didn’t turn out like those Safin matches.

I might be crazy; I might be insanely into this game. After all it’s just a game right? But what a game.

DRSM Session II

Topic: Best Songs Ever
Moderator: M Jay


L Coeus has been added to the conversation
Retro Junky has been added to the conversation

M Jay: hello two lone people. I think AT abandoned us because I was unable to reply to him earlier but I’m hoping he has a guilt attack and joins us soon
Retro Junky: What didn’t you reply to him about?
M Jay: I wasn't here when he messaged and when I did manage to show up wateen was adamant at p*****g me off
L Coeus: I don’t see many Ranters today :P [Mod: Glasses anyone?]
Retro Junky: Khair I think the Ranters got scared off because of the last topic we discussed here haha
L Coeus: And today’s topics are not that great either?
Retro Junky: they are fine!
L Coeus: well might be because I don’t have such a good taste in music :P
Retro Junky: then today's discussion will help you out
M Jay: Music! Everyone wants music
Retro Junky: Yeah! =D
L Coeus: merey ronde ney naina, mereeyy roonnnnddeeeyyy naaaiinnnaaaa heho
L Coeus: JUNNOOOONNNNNNNNN
M Jay: I love Junoon too
Retro Junky: wasn’t it kainday nay nainaa? Haven’t heard this one
M Jay: haha what is THAT?!
Retro Junky: yea it is sad that they broke up, I heard Ali Azmat say that “we lasted almost a decade and I think that’s more than enough”
M Jay: he's a dumb*** then! Good music can't be measured in years
Retro Junky: yea look at RHCP. I think they have been around for 2 decades and still going strong
M Jay: although that monkey bandri guy kinda scares me at times
L Coeus: RHCP!!!! …… RHCP??? [Mod: Hysterical much?]
Retro Junky: yes rhcp
L Coeus: oh got it.
M Jay: I don't have credit to call anyone
L Coeus: GHHOOMMMMM charkhhhaa GHHOOOOMMMMMM heho aaahhhhhhh postpaid zindabad :P such an elevating song with aallaa music.....

AT has been added to the conversation.

Retro Junky: abida parveen?
L Coeus: no I’m talking about the junoon version...
Retro Junky: I haven’t heard the junoon version!!! OMG I should listen to it
L Coeus: ohhhhhhh AAAALLLLLAAAAA! Bulleya album mein hey....
AT: monsier ali wasn't able to make it, this is his humble friend. Ready to represent him in front of his acquaintances
M Jay: you want I make intros this time around? And not the one liner ones don't worry.

SB has been added to the conversation.

L Coeus: People, AT. AT, People hehe
M Jay: hey B! ahh so it’s like hum panch abb, that funny sitcom.. Which I don't know why I recalled all of a sudden
AT: it IS called the funny sitcom
Retro Junky: have heard the name never seen it
M Jay: well I don't think the guys would be too happy to be molded in the roles of girls... it was about 5 sisters...
AT: M you are a guy!! How cud u... =\
AT: so was there the vote?
M Jay: yes. Everybody wants music
AT: songs won I presume?
M Jay: *surprise surprise*
Retro Junky: AT should change his font color
AT: I chose maroon MJ chose red
M Jay: and now I choose maroon
AT: they're both shades of red so pretty much the same thing no?
Retro Junky: oh then Jay should change hers, it’s getting confusing
M Jay: ahghh of course I would have to
AT: we've got different fonts u see, its visible to the naked eye.
M Jay: andhi karao apni aankhey ab [Mod’s note: Sporting a puker shade of orangish red]
Retro Junky: Lol much better :P
M Jay: anyway S.O.N.G.S
AT: so what’s your latest favorite song?
SB: shukar hai
Retro Junky: gaanay! [Mod: Thank you for the translation! Great work *angel*]
SB: good topic
M Jay: of course B closest to your heart
SB: I’ll b eating n typing
AT: mine would be 'breathe me' by Sia
M Jay: 2 votes for that AT
AT: and 'never too late; by three days grace
Retro Junky: Sia?
AT: lol yea Sia as in.. shadow in urdu
L Coeus: I don’t keep myself updated with the latest songs sooo.......
SB: so replies r gonna b really slow
Retro Junky: That’s alright SB take your time with phood
M Jay: yeah it’s our new fave these days
AT: it’s sung by a guy actually, MJ and I think it’s sung by a girl which proves everyone that we're true Aries
M Jay: lol did you check out her bio then?
AT: no I merely imagined it, M
Retro Junky: ok the songs dun have to be the new ones only
M Jay: yar I feel like someone is stabbing fingers into my eyes this color is HORRIBLE
L Coeus: but anyone heard "loverman - Metallica"
AT: nope
Retro Junky: nope
AT: hero of the day by Metallica
Retro Junky: acha shouldn’t we talk about genres first?
SB: nope not the song but Metallica is really good
M Jay: the girl you lost to cocaine - Sia ;p ... AT a recommendation for you.. I couldn't find the original version though
AT: there's an original version?!
Retro Junky: the best rock song ever?
AT: do u know Metallica sounds like metal?
L Coeus: BUT Metallica doesn’t have all only metal songs, some are really melodious and towards rock...
AT: my fav genres in rock are alternative, indie and progressive
M Jay: I don't really like Metallica
SB: “nothin else matters” for example
AT: in metal... I like symphonic metal. Metal + opera!! Amazing!!
AT: anyone heard symphonic metal?
L Coeus: S&M version of nothing else matters... its DAAYYUUMNNNN! the whole S&M album is awesome
M Jay: chalo
AT: hahaha
M Jay: ab poori album suney baith jaoo
L Coeus: qasasm sey it’s worth it...
AT: nahi baithna zuroori tou nahi hai
M Jay: i know you have sickle wit AT. No need to rub it in ;p
SB: unforgiven too would b my fave Metallica song
L Coeus: mine would be loverman but u guys haven’t heard of it, download it....
M Jay: I miss >>>> ;p
AT: yea me too ;P
AT: I’ll download everything don’t u worry
AT: everything...
AT: haunting no?
M Jay: Very
M Jay: echoes back too
Retro Junky: ok I was just going thru my music folders and I cant figure out my fave rock song lol :(
L Coeus: You’re talking to a guy who has downloaded GBs upon GBs that too on dialup heho
M Jay: umm I love smells like teen spirit by nirvana
Retro Junky: oh haan I love that one
M Jay: but then I have this thing with nirvana which I can't explain and that’s just that
AT: search for fav rock song on Google, they claim they can help u find everything....everything...everythingg.. ;P
Retro Junky: well they can’t find my fave rock song
L Coeus: I got around 60+GB of songs but I hardly listen to them apart from select few..
AT: then why'd u download them?
M Jay: to show off
L Coeus: I didn’t, got a drive full from a friend :P
AT: cheating!!
SB: stinkfist and noose these are my fav rock songs
AT: the noosE!
Retro Junky: khair it has to be an rhcp or LP song
M Jay: numb!
Retro Junky: Yeah!! Numb my fav LP song
AT: a perfect cirle, vast and porcupine tree are my fav. bands (fun fact of the day)
L Coeus: LP.... they are good.... thats all i'll say :P
Retro Junky: californication by rhcp
Retro Junky: 3 libras by apc
SB: lol i really like apc myself
AT: apc is HOT
M Jay: we used to be friends - dandy warhols
AT: hahahaha warhols...
AT: where's mini?
SB: finally done wid dinner.. abb we can really talk music! haan where those two girls?
M Jay: I'd like the answer to that myself
AT: mini makes ONE girl.. wht are u trying to say huh? =P
Retro Junky: plus AIK as well
AT: k.. there's an AIK aswell
M Jay: since i'm out of credit.. AT wud you be kind enuf to be my messenger of the day?
AT: of course im kind enuf
AT: aik as in one?
L Coeus: btw what so ever happened to those non-one-liner intros!!! :P
M Jay: haii acha janab
M Jay: AT: ohio going monsieur
M Jay: >>ARIES<< AT: Yay!! So am i Aries or the ohio going monseiur?
M Jay: and no other information to be divulged under the clause 4.0.9 of the secret society cult
AT: of course of course
L Coeus: ohhh yeah the cult....
M Jay: you need to add 'AND' combine the sentences you have your one sentence
L Coeus: THE CULT...
AT: the culut
AT: the and cult? ;P
L Coeus: emphasis the second time around :P
M Jay: L Coeus = who thinks from his brain.. or so he thinks plus DISEC '06 partner in crime.. since nigeria never bothered to talk...
L Coeus: dnt tell me u dnt think that!!!!! :P
Retro Junky: ok wot r u guys talkin abt? seems so random
AT: it IS random
Retro Junky: SB do u get anything here?
AT: apparantly is part of their THE CULT
M Jay: DISEC is connected to LUMUN... think think
SB: lol i dun

[Mod's note: Incase anybody is still suspicious of our claim that we are sixth graders.. below is a short example]

*nudge*

AT: ghalti say!

*nudge*

AT: " You may not send a nudge that often. "

*nudge*

L Coeus: nudge cycle completed!!!! :P

*nudge*

M Jay: NOW its complete

*nudge*

AT: Oops

*nudge*

SB: stop that i did it by mistake
M Jay: what goes around comes around
AT: hahahaha
SB: n now it's gettin irritating
Retro Junky: its called chain reaction
AT: danger looms arnd the nudge (corner)
L Coeus: okhey 6 mins toh lights out....
AT: thanks for such a wonderful reminder
L Coeus: time chnaged at my side, it goes for lunch at 2200hrs
AT: next best thing to waking up at 6
AT: IT kee aise ke taise
M Jay: we shud curse WAPDA one whole session
SB: guys aren't we talking music anymore??
AT: no, i'd rather burn lesco =P
Retro Junky: everyone shud buy a laptop for DRSM's sake!
AT: heard lesco by wapda?
M Jay: Ahh a classic! it has a nice tone, but just manages to annoy one time or another...
Retro Junky: SB guess we'll hav to do widout music
SB: :(
M Jay: haha guys GUYS!
M Jay: serious
AT: don't make me send a wink... tht's more than just music
M Jay: *straight face*
AT: i'll make a piggy dance on the window, music tou baad kee baat hai lol
Retro Junky: :
M Jay: anyway.. fave bands..??
L Coeus: take a wild guess :P
M Jay: junoon? :P
L Coeus: bingo.... electra aap ka huwa haha
AT: vast, apc, pt
M Jay: kuch zada hi shorthand use nahi ho raha?
Retro Junky: u knw wot i have just realized m not all that crazy abt music
M Jay: oh wow!
Retro Junky: i listen to wotever they r playin on V and mtv
M Jay: switchfoot anyone?
Retro Junky: oh haan! dare u to move. Love that song
SB: there was another topic too rite?
Retro Junky: L coeus kee bijlee nahi gayee?
L Coeus: not yet, im suprised haha
M Jay: hahaha @ B
AT: heard the theme song for 'across the universe'?
M Jay: what is with that movie?
AT: tht movie is cool and the song is cooler, check it out
Retro Junky: haha its the DRSM blessing! havnt heard ov it
SB: i did see the ad, the song in the background,that song?
AT: yea me too didn't watch the movie but heard the song
M Jay: everybody needs to be honest.. How many of us used to listen to Backstreet Boys when we were young... or one point or another in our life? :P
M Jay: HONEST
AT: ME!
M Jay: i still do btw
SB: yeahh it's got a gud feel to it
AT: Westlife Boyzone Nsync
Retro Junky: ME!
AT: u name it
Retro Junky: Yupp
SB: i did listen to them
Retro Junky: all of them
AT: 'quit play games with my heart', 'larger than life'
AT: damn.. on those cassette players
Retro Junky: but i wud like to add NEW KIDS ON THE BLOCK!
M Jay: i want it that way!
Retro Junky: nktob anyone?
AT: nktob? Lol
Retro Junky: no? :(
AT: try pronouncing tht lol [Mod’s note: Niktoob? Nucktob? Nucktooble? Yankeedoodle?]
M Jay: Noodle

SB has left the conversation.

M Jay: i loved the mulan soundtrack
Retro Junky: yes yes we were lil babies when they were ruling the world so yea new kids on the block we can pronounce that
M Jay: lights out at my end
Retro Junky: ohh thats why SB went offline

L Coeus has left the conversation.

Retro Junky: another victim
AT: lights in baby lights in!! (H)
M Jay: down boy
AT: in fact so many lights, my guy wears shades (H)
M Jay: its a three ppl party now any confessions? closed group
Retro Junky: why dont u go first? :P
AT: this is AT's bro :P thts a confession, no?
M Jay: thats a great confession since you don't have one
AT: but AT imagined me! and tht wud make me michael scofield so.. once again.. (H)
M Jay: alas! no loss of AT's sense of tumor
Retro Junky: ohhh wah wah m jay wud like that
M Jay: you just have to bring michael in :P
Retro Junky: tumor lol
M Jay: shut up RJ!
Retro Junky: oh but why?:P
AT: MICHELE scofield is wht i like to call him
M Jay: ughh you're annoying me rite now
Retro Junky: oyeee!! its Michael!
M Jay: no changing genders okay?! we have already ppl doing that a lot these days
Retro Junky: lol yea
AT: nahi guys seriously, if u like rock.. listen to APC i can recommend a few songz
Retro Junky: like SB
M Jay: is she changing genders?!
Retro Junky: she recommends a new song to me almost daily
M Jay: oh okay
AT: the outsider by apc
AT: aur mein idhar tarasraha hota hun
AT: sia was amazing! Girls like alternative rock.. so i'll forget apc for the moment
M Jay: breathe - anna nalick
AT: the freshman by verve pipe
Retro Junky: so beautiful by Pete Murray
M Jay: “Diary of Jane - Breaking Benjamin” I never thought you could dance to this song, but
apparently I was wrong.. Saw step up 2 recently
Retro Junky: so cold by breaking Benjamin
AT: DUDE!! my dad scared ali! Do u know my parents saw people in my house
M Jay: coming to take you away?
AT: yeah and my dad thought he heard someone so I went like =O
Retro Junky: what? Like ghosts?
AT: no like REAL people
AT: well not real but.. yeah people
Retro Junky: jinaat !!
AT: I think I told M Jay about the thing when my dad saw a woman in the bedroom and my sis was the witness to a thing as in..
Retro Junky: ok is your house haunted?
AT: it’s a complicated story
M Jay: *benevolent expression*
AT: hahahaha
AT: benevolent expression
Retro Junky: means carry on
AT: lol.. nahi nahi too long
AT: music.. remember?
Retro Junky: *benevolent expression*
AT: my throat's sour so I can’t tell ;P
Retro Junky: lol clever
M Jay: time after time - quietdrive I like this version better than Cyndi lauper's
AT: never too late by heidly
AT: blind mary by gnarlz
Retro Junky: no i love cyndi's one
AT: knocked up by kings of leon!! Awesome song
M Jay: I didn't find that song AT
AT: which one??
M Jay: blind mary
AT: u dont have blind mary?!
M Jay: looked for it didn't find it
AT: mary wont like tht Jay! =O
Retro Junky: believe in me by Lenny Kravitz
AT: lenny kravitz made me puke when he was with some female actress i think it was nicole kidman (sorry to be gay) i hated him ever since
Retro Junky: y u got a crush on nicole kidman? [Mod's note: HaHa! Not Kidman....]
AT: no no im a racist u see
M Jay: ufff yes i'm sorry but there is just something wrong there
Retro Junky: ohh so i see bichara lenny
AT: uff M’s font is so BLACK.. RJ's is so GREEN!! uff see? racist.
AT: andhi mary
M Jay: mary won't like that AT ;p
M Jay: AT you forgot ------> Brothers on a Hotel Bed how could we?!
Retro Junky: it’s so funny, anyway is it a band or a song n who sang it?
AT: such great heights by the postal service (Y)
AT: the district sleeps alone tonight by the postal service!!
M Jay: love that song
M Jay: it’s a song by death cab for cutie you HAVE to listen to it
AT: marching bands of manhattan by death cab for a cutie..
M Jay: yayy and soul meets body
AT: the trapeze swinger by iron and wine
M Jay: silence by delerium and sarah mclachlan
AT: consequence by the notwist
Retro Junky: love song - 311
M Jay: i hear the bells - mike doughty
AT: download thse songs dude, they're pieces of gold
AT: if you're into gold tht is
M Jay: if uncle wateen allows that
AT: diamonds perhaps?
AT: What do you mean?
M Jay: it means my hatred for this green thing grows minute by minute no pun intended RJ :P
AT: the future isnt green, it’s mean
Retro Junky: it’s okay wateen isnt the only green thing!
AT: Wateen is green and makes me go green so put it behind a screen
M Jay: it’s white too
M Jay: now what does that say?
AT: Wateen is mean*
Retro Junky: makes me wanna scream
Retro Junky: I wanna ice cream hah
M Jay: the fray - how to save a life
M Jay: gavin degraw - i don't want to be
Retro Junky: chasing cars - snow petrol
AT: good songs
M Jay: Gravenhurst - see my friends
AT: Jay u will be kind enough to send me the names of the songs no?
M Jay: incomplete informative session
AT: because this convo is huge
M Jay: haha I’m always kind. I think…
AT: =O
AT: anyway i'm off, salutations to that L guy and SB
Retro Junky: well I say those who were absent must be punished ! :P
AT: yea no byes for them >(

DRSM Session I

Topic: "End of the World"
Moderator: M Jay

Mini: yellow people!
M Jay: no we're all brown mini. NOT yellow.
L Coeus: elloe....

Mini: floozie!

M Jay: Greetings. We start our session with an ending. Not ours of course. Just the world's. If you have that squarish/rectangular box that is everyone's best mate, you would have had enough experience of watching humans die in every possible way. Godzilla? Check. Cloverfield? Check. 4th of July? Check. Day After Tomorrow? Check. The point: How's the end of the world in your mind?
Mini: jeeju insan ban!
M Jay: Do remember the Mayans have already declared us doomed by 2012. So lets have it
Mini: we're doooooomed! ahhhhhhhhh
L Coeus: aahh end of world, are we talking about the man mad annihilation or the other one, the end of times!!!!!!
M Jay: open ended L Coeus
Retro Junky: ohkay, first hi ppl
L Coeus: walaikum hi
AIK: hello all
L Coeus: and what so ever happeend to intros m jay!!!!!
M Jay: lets just say i'm not big on them. Everyone , Ashar. Ashar, Everyone
Lord Coeus: ahh right, i feel right at home
M Jay: I'd like to hear SB talk as well
AIK: SB is lost with gerard
M Jay: lets start with Mini. Whats your end of the world?
Mini: huh...start wat? end of the world?
M Jay: yes damnit!
SB: Hey every1
Retro Junky: oh she is finally awake
L Coeus: walaikum hey SB
M Jay: i've fallen in with a bunch of hello cheerios types! See what i meant by the 3 line hellos?!
ASB: Yup. Lol, mini didn't you read the guidelines?
Mini: i did but this aint my favorite topic
M Jay: welcome to the real world mini, unicorns don't exist and we all die
AIK: end of the world..??like how did it even start?
Retro Junky: in my mind the end is scary, yup
L Coeus: Ends are always scary, even the happy endings, caz they are oblivious to what lies ahead
Mini: we'll all die one day...i dunno why ppl make it so drastic in the movies
M Jay: I don't want our identities to be OUT there, for further information and scare, kindly watch THE NET
L Coeus: scare!!!!! the net!!!!!!!! how old were u when u watched it jay???
M Jay: the same time when i was getting frackin scared by the big dumb doll Chuckie
Retro Junky: well how wud u feel if u lost ur identity?
M Jay: hello back to the topic!
SB: yeah becuz i am not getting anythin anymore!
L Coeus: 10 mins to lights out at my side....
M Jay: and thats the end of the world for you?
ASB: Well, I think that if we don't die of the heat, we probably will kill each other
Retro Junky: its 10 min to end for coeus
AIK: 1 hour probably to my end! and in a day we all end atleast 5 times..weird no?
L Coeus: i am seeing weather as more and more a probable cause....
M Jay: ASB has interest in lets say the extra terrestrial.. any comment on that?
ASB: Ah, well I highly doubt that aliens will come to invade Earth... I have other theories about aliens, but lets not go there.
L Coeus: A.V.P!!!!!!
SB: hmmm it is gonna be pretty scary i am hopin i don't live to see it
L Coeus: and i'm hoping i live to see it, gonna be interesting
M Jay: lets just say if we aren't ambushed by monkey jr. first, we might still make it to the next level
SB: dude this topic is really depressing
M Jay: what about killer zombie donkeys? Any idea when they would be attacking anytime soon?
Retro Junky: zombie donkeys =/
L Coeus: i think Jay is alredy suffering from a blackout
AIK: sigh @world history students' theories
Retro Junky: yea exactly AIK! give ur scientific theory
M Jay: oh yes and the black out ofcourse.. you remember what happened in US and Canada rite SB: wat happened?
Retro Junky: the blackouts SB, they went all crazy like monkeys then
AIK: what happened in US Jay?
L Coeus: Much of Canada and I think Northern parts of US went to darkness due to unkown reasons....
SB: When was that and why dun i know it?!
AIK: exactly same here SB
Retro Junky: Because u watch E! instead of CNN all the time
M Jay: umm am i like on planet earth still?
L Coeus: Bingo, electra aap ka huwa Jay
SB: lolzz thats probably rite
AIK: no way i dont have E! on!But that doesnt mean I watch CNN all the time=p
M Jay: what do you guys think about dinosaurs making it back?
Retro Junky: Oh yeaaaaaa
ASB: Ah... I think that is possible
AIK: watchin CNN??
Retro Junky: I would love that
SB: They wont
Mini: never gonna happen
Retro Junky: they can
M Jay: it would be so easy to hide
L Coeus: some one is impressed with speilberg, ALOT
M Jay: never say never mini
AIK: argghh where is it going?
M Jay: with the humanity falling back to neanderthal ways you never can be too sure
ASB: how about a couple of earthquakes and tsunamis?
Retro Junky: nope! We have had enuff of those
M Jay: shake things up you mean?
AIK: Jay..would u give me time off to bring a dictionary?=p
SB: yeah...I dun want nymore of those
L Coeus: killer asteroid!!!!!
AIK: yeh the asteroid thing is true
Mini: then y not a comet? that'll be the coolest
AIK: Comets you see in the sky...never came to earth i guess=p
M Jay: I think the space would love to have vengence on us. What about being sucked in the black hole?
Retro Junky: oh haan i always wondered wots in there
M Jay: a comet would jaliofiy us all hello! Nothing "cool" about it.
Mini: imagine us all running aronud like a bunch of loonatics
Retro Junky: hey is the universe shrinking or expanding?
AIK: expandinggg!!!
Mini: aaaaaa save our planet earth we're being sucked up by NOTHING!
AIK: Doppler's affect
Mini: its expanding definately, then its gonna suddenly poof!
Retro Junky: I hope not pooof man
ASB: Oh.... maybe some weird experiment will go very wrong and jeopardize Earth, for example, they might create antimatter or something
Mini: that is more possible then any of the others
Retro Junky: hmm like 28 days later. I loved that movie. Can we actually create antimatter?

L Coeus has left the conversation.

SB: science!! u r discussing science. This is sad!
AIK: end of the LORD!!!
Retro Junky: Its made of neutrinos if i'm not wrong
ASB: well, it would annihilate matter but it is possible to create it and no, it's made of positrons.
Retro Junky: no positron are only antimatters of electrons
ASB: Basically, the theory is that there is a mirror image of this universe somewhere out there and if the two meet, BOOOM! End of both worlds
M Jay: AT is stuck in the supermarket btw
Retro Junky: yes its made of antimatter, rite
AIK: woww mirror image!!
M Jay: wow!! and mini and I are banging our heads against the nearest wall
Mini: lol i so agree with u Jay! all this psysics talk is....
M Jay: interesting actually, but no one likes a show off
SB: yeah boring the hell outta me
ASB: Well, in that case, what do you think about books killing people??
M Jay: and the crop circles? The nazca lines? whats all that if not 'something out there'
Retro Junky: crop circles, were those real?!
SB: no they werent
M Jay: nahi i just went last night and made them
Retro Junky: badddd girl! you almost scared the hell out of me
M Jay: i know weird huh?
Retro Junky: You'll be workin on the farm 2morrow to fix em
M Jay: What else should I say? Everyone is gay" - Kurt Cobain, I think that would signify another end of the world
SB: Where did that come from?
AIK: Did kurt cobain say this..i wonder
SB: did he m jay?
M Jay: he did say that i have no reason to make up random gay comments and blame them on Cobain
Retro Junky: He did. Dats da reason he killed himself! He was so embarrassed..
SB: wat???????????????
AIK: is that why he commited suicide=S
Retro Junky: haan na
SB: wat a foolish reason. i dun think he did that becuz of this reason. He killed himself, thats for sure.
M Jay: oh purleez! Love killed him that butch
AIK: yeh i am quite convinced he wasnt suicidal
SB: He was. He tried to kill himself before that
M Jay: He did not kill himself.. just like Ledger didn't, just you wait for 5 yrs to pass off thats i IF we aren't dead already: MAYANS, which brings us back to 2012
SB: dude kia ho gaya hai, he even left a suicide note! He believed he had done everything he cud do. Life lost it's charm
AIK: Chalo we can ask kurt after the world ends..and we all end too
M Jay: Everything you see on the telly or whatever the media feeds you isn't the truth.. Mini why don't you shed some light on 2012?
AIK: all conspiracy theories and what not. Finally mini broke the long silence.
Mini: erm..
AIK: No mini didnt.... No she did!
M Jay: she's about to
Mini: lol
M Jay: For the record "erm" is not a gud silence breaker and neither is "lol"... ASB you have enuf knowledge on the subject no?
ASB: end of the world?
M Jay: the mayans.. 2012
Retro Junky: wots thatttttttttttttttttttt??? MAYANS!
M Jay: this calender they made
Retro Junky: kia hai yeh!
AIK: *blank*, yeh whats that...enlighten us
M Jay: I've been bakwasifying to the wall i suppose for the past 40 minutes! Mayans were the ones we started with. Good to know you're paying attention thank you very much all!
SB: yeah i have no idea wat mayan is
AIK: btw Jay where do u get all of this from? Running some secret satellite thing?? ..
Mini: great race i suppose but since we don't exactly have reliable records how can we asume anything about them? Btw who came up with the propechy? i mean it was lost with the civilizaton so...
ASB: No... prophecies are never lost
M Jay: they dug it out... yeah well they were good at astronomy, mathematics and what not
SB: And wat does that have to do wid anything?
AIK: ohh are u talking abt some greek civilisation?
ASB: and they believed that the world would come to an end in 2012
Mini: they were not greek
SB: Now i c the point
M Jay: people may i suggest the use of wikipedia, the bible and quran of everything out there
AIK: u r one jay..arent u?
M Jay: the next time i'll probably invite you guys to talk on the sickest songs! God how i violate my own rules
SB: that wud b fun
AIK: britney's?
M Jay: See! See! just look at this brady bunch
SB: naa not britney
Mini: Mesoamerican civilization, noted for the only known fully developed written language of the pre-Columbian Americas, as well as its spectacular art, monumental architecture, and sophisticated mathematical and astronomical systems. The Maya peoples never disappeared, neither at the time of the Classic period decline nor with the arrival of the Spanish conquistadores and the subsequent Spanish colonization of the Americas. Today, the Maya and their descendants form sizable populations throughout the Maya area and maintain a distinctive set of traditions and beliefs that are the result of the merger of pre-Columbian and post-Conquest ideologies (and structured by the almost total adoption of Roman Catholicism)
M Jay: thumbs up Wikipedia! But well see the point is we all gather here to expand our horizons SB: Mini u studied world history too?
M Jay: lol yes. She was the other friendly hobbit
Mini: yeah i did but this hunny is from wiki darling http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Image:Palenque_Ruins.jpg.... its so pwetty! Jay i wanna go see!
M Jay: i'd like the alien slugs to descend upon us now please *looks up*
ASB: Me tooo!!
M Jay: yeah well lets elope. We'll pick up peru along the way and that wud be the end of that
Mini: yea lets go crazy!
M Jay: Like you aren't enough. But little bo beep see, we're surrounded by this icky reality
and it is icky yes, so no cottage for you and i can't have hourly trips to my forest.
SB: Jay r u ok?
M Jay: thats a pretty hard question
AIK: she's kinda lost it, the cottage and all...
M Jay: "the lying cokehead plastic surgeon lecturing me on karma?" lol scratch that... But okay so its frakin easy to lose perspective, yeah and thats what i love about this life of ours... not one dull moment
ASB: I have to study chemistry and do that musicology assignment, deadline's on my head
M Jay: thats why i'm heading towards the end. Any last thoughts? Starting with ASB
ASB: See you in heaven? *angel*
AIK: musicology..great...i wondered it even existed
Mini: End of the world... its gonna come one way or the other...have no fear
ASB: We come into this world alone, we are going to leave alone... if we knew when the world would end, we would be so worried that we wouldn't do anything right.. so sit back and enjoy life. AIK: Music might end the world, the big bang..the noise! .... no sorry..thats how universe came into being =p
M Jay: Now mini what do you have to say?
Mini: I think next time lets discuss gender issues, since there are more females here we're sure to win!
ASB: No!!! I've had enough of feminism
Mini: then u take the guys' side
ASB: No... I wouldn't take any sides
Mini: then I'll take their side!
M Jay: like transexuals?
AIK: That would interest the dullest
M Jay: begum nawazish gives me the willies
ASB: hahaha
ASB: Look who's back! No, you take mosquito's side


L COEUS has been added to the conversation.


M Jay: L Coeus we're just wrapping it up any last thoughts on the end of the world?
L Coeus: coeus returns
AIK: could be a great movie name
L Coeus: so where are we?? has the world ended yet??
M Jay: More or less in my head
L Coeus: last thoughts!!!!
M Jay: yes please
AIK: before the world ends
M Jay: last thoughts not last words ppl
L Coeus: i don't even knw wht has been discussed!!!
M Jay: well thats the beauty of load shedding! you're out of the loop: Congratulations!
AIK: haaaha good one jay
L Coeus: If u put it that way then its gonna end thats all i can say
Retro Junky: Back!!
AIK: what did u eat?=D
Retro Junky: Rice, Biryani to be precise.
AIK: *glances at jay*
M Jay: koi haal nahi
AIK : yum
L Coeus: Apart from the Islamic perpective, which defines the end of all time, there are gonna be mini-end of worlds, wars that are gonna ravage the earth down to a bare minimum of people....
M Jay: yes well biryani express will be gone too when the world ends
Retro Junky: lol i know dats da sadest part
ASB: au revoir ma chegi!
Mini: oui
L Coeus: ohkey here i am being asked end of world thoughts and biryani is being discussed....
M Jay: hence last thought, yours and yours alone
Retro Junky: biryani is yummy and we'll miss it when the world ends
AIK: yeh mini ends..
M Jay: MINI ends. I loveth that
L Coeus: mini ends....
M Jay: mini have you gone through any spontaneous combustion the last time i checked?
L Coeus: anyways, escalating wars, global weather patterns are shifting if u guys have noticed. So they are gonna effect food production alot and will result in alot of famines....
M Jay: I did. So did National Geographic and Algore. But sadly no one else seems interested
Retro Junky: Yup things r pretty screwed up
L Coeus: I doubt about a killer meteor
AIK: I would prefer a planet bang if any
L Coeus: Well the weather shifts are almost like slowed down versions from that freakish weather movie... Day after Tommorrow
SB: That is exactly the way the world is gonna end
M Jay: Hey B! we want your end. In your mind that is, and it doesn't have to be gruesome.. think of us being pretty fairies up above. Fairies bag the most handsome guys.
L Coeus: the end is going to be anything but pretty...
M Jay: oh so i sugar coated it for B. Big Deal!
Retro Junky: I hope my end wud be peaceful, i wud wanna die while i'm asleep.
M Jay: I don't like mermaids..
Retro Junky: yea like ew...half fish half human
ASB: I wuv mermaids. I want to be a mermaid
M Jay: You shall have your option up above
L Coeus: Okhey somebody watches alot of cartoons here...
M Jay: like you didn't
L Coeus: didnt, past tense
Retro Junky: I still watch cartoons. loads ov em
ASB: I wuv cartoons!
M Jay: oh i know cartoons it is next time, since everyone is oh so excited
AIK: Are there any mermaid cartoons?
Retro Junky: I dont like disney cartoons much, I prefer the ones which used to air on NTM long time back
SB says: lil mermaid..thats the name rite?
M Jay: Think of a disney cartoon end of the world
L Coeus: No cartoon please! no cartoon! *begging on his knees*
M Jay: Sorry you're out voted here, the mod has double votes and ofcourse the power to make rules as she goes along
L Coeus: so wht does the senior member get?????
M Jay: the senior member gets to have the honour of hanging out with the juniors
Mini: If we're talkin about cartoons i'm bak!
M Jay: thank you! i thought you had well splintered up
SB: I dun watch cartoons either, but nothing wrong in discussin em
AIK: I havent watched in ages! i didn't know abt little mermaid even!
Retro Junky: thats so sad! tune on to cartoon network NOW! and watch courage the cowardly dog...oh i luv that pink dog
Mini: I love...sing with me...K U Z C U! kuzco luzco KUZCO!
AIK: PINK!!
Retro Junky: yes pink n so adorable!
Mini: pink dog?
M Jay: courage?
ASB: I like all the classics, flintstones, jetsons, johnny quest, top cat
Retro Junky: yaaaaayyy u got that rite
Mini: coward!
Retro Junky: courage! yes he is a coward
AIK: hate johnny quest
Retro Junky: AIK take ur words bak rite now
M Jay: Hello have you guys skipped to next week already? its still 21st here
Mini: lol
M Jay: yup i just checked.. totally confirmed it
Mini: we love u so much we thought we'd begin it today
M Jay: oh wow i feel so much better!... and gay already
AIK: haaha
M Jay: omg and you don't want to be stoned to death hopefully, so yeah take that back
AIK: i like the rest of them..not johnny
L Coeus: did somebody say stoned to death!!!!!
Retro Junky: hawwww hayeeeeeeee YES! she did
AIK: evil
M Jay: I know my big mouth won't shut up
Retro Junky: for the sake of johnny quest we can go to all extremes
L Coeus: so i can see
M Jay: and i agree with that statement hence on this chipper note i'd like to declare today's ranting session officially over..
M Jay: And obviously my hand wants me to stop typing.